Life update: goddamn shit edition

hey remember how my landlord is a cunt well here we go again fuckers. Lynx Eventer for your time.

Illustration for article titled Life update: goddamn shit edition
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Illustration for article titled Life update: goddamn shit edition
Illustration for article titled Life update: goddamn shit edition
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So my water heater burst this past weekend and whoever installed it didn’t put shutoff valves (literally $8 apiece) on the water lines going into it so I couldn’t shut it off. To further the stupidity, the utilities are on the 2nd floor so it was raining into the bathroom until maintenance came over and shut water off to the whole apartment until they could come replace the water heater the next day. My wife had a stomach bug so the lack of a flushing toilet was... an issue. I digress. The next morning they show up and fix the water heater and all is well. They make some vague mention of showing up at some point to fix the water damage in the bathroom but no date or timeline is mentioned and the dude doesn’t really speak English anyways so I figure I’ll get a call or something. Nope. Dude rocks into the apartment four days later without knocking or giving any prior notice at all and scares the shit out of my wife who doesn’t wear clothes when she’s at home. The next day I get a notice of violation of my lease because I guess the goddamn kitten missed the litter box and they’re crying about how it’s unsanitary and is going to ruin the tiles (??? it’s on bare concrete) and how I didn’t tell them I had cats which, I fucking did, I don’t fucking have to, and it doesn’t fucking matter because I paid my pet deposit which allows me however many pets I damn well please. After re-reading the lease, though, I noticed that they explicitly mention I have to have an automatic litter box which wasn’t mentioned in the violation but I guess I’m buying a $170 litter box now before they show up and bitch at me about it since they’ll be paying attention to that now.

And yes, entering the apartment like that is a violation of Kansas state statute 58-2557

Landlord’s right to enter; limitations. (a) The landlord shall have the right to enter the dwelling unit at reasonable hours, after reasonable notice to the tenant, in order to inspect the premises, make necessary or agreed repairs, decorations, alterations or improvements, supply necessary or agreed services, or exhibit the dwelling unit to prospective or actual purchasers, mortgagees, tenants, workmen or contractors. (b) The landlord may enter the dwelling unit without consent of the tenant in case of an extreme hazard involving the potential loss of life or severe property damage. (c) The landlord shall not abuse the right of access or use it to harass the tenant.

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This is the same landlord that used an out-of-town towing company to attempt to tow my bikes (would have been $2000 to get them back if they removed them, had to pay $170 to make the tow truck driver go away) for not having parking permits. Permits that are never mentioned in the lease or the sign on the property which states “Parking for *apartment name* residents only” and as I am a resident and those were my registered and legal bikes and the sign didn’t even come close to meeting city requirements for verbiage or lettering size (yes I’m that fucking picky) they had no legal right to do shit with my bikes.

Fuck.

3 months till I buy a house but I have to not become homeless before then. God damn. I’m just surprised they aren’t bitching at me for the very nebulous “house is too dirty” horsefuckery that every landlord loves to leverage because, admittedly, we have way too much shit in this tiny little house which is why I’m buying a big house. I even have a $50/mo storage unit full of shit and my... I don’t want to self-diagnose but I believe it’s ADHD + bipolar disorder, makes keeping a house clean fucking impossible. I made some headway on my office last night until I got distracted by my bike’s wiring harness and tore the room apart again finding batteries and wiring tools and stuff and now I can’t even see my own floor.

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EDIT: Local friend who has rented says the “reasonable notice” is a 24 hour in advance written note for non emergency entry.