I Christened My New Tacoma Because I Am Going Stir-Crazy

Absolutely caked in the fender wells and underneath. I think I hit the puddle with a bit more enthusiasm than I should have...
Absolutely caked in the fender wells and underneath. I think I hit the puddle with a bit more enthusiasm than I should have...

I’ve decided that my whole family is going stir-crazy. After weeks of going nowhere except work and the store, I went and christened my 1100 mile 2020 Toyota Tacoma TRD Off-Road in a mudhole. My wife then followed me in her minivan?!!!

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I’ll admit that I have a problem. This is the first step of many? All the nice cars I have never get used for they’re capable of doing. I have this problem with my E60 M5; I never drive it, it is simply too clean and too nice.

Terrible picture off my Instagram that I posted in my story.
Terrible picture off my Instagram that I posted in my story.
Photo: MT Blake
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Maybe it has something to do with the fact I was that weird kid that built Legos and never played with them. I’d just look at them and admire. Is this some sort of a personality flaw or sickness? The first signs of the ‘Rona taking me down?!

With these thoughts in mind, I decided to christen my very new and low mile 2020 Tacoma. What better way to go use a truck... than going and using it for what it was made to do! Every Tacoma Off-Road I see on the street seems to be exceptionally clean so I can’t be the only one who doesn’t like a dirty truck?

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The Dodge in the background most certainly would have gotten stuck. It almost got stuck in the mud in my yard for god sakes.
The Dodge in the background most certainly would have gotten stuck. It almost got stuck in the mud in my yard for god sakes.

Not far from home is a terrible road with a large mud hole. This road is something anyone can theoretically pass with a higher likelihood of causing damage to their vehicle. There are a couple of inclines, sharp rocks, and a two-foot deep mud hole that mostly makes the road impassable.

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I took my exceptionally mint and new Tacoma into the mud. God do I hate mud. There is nothing worse than getting stuck in the mud and then having to clean it out of every possible place you would and wouldn’t expect. The mud seems to linger for years after a good mud bath.

Regardless of my neat-freak tendencies, I dove the black on black Tacoma straight into the middle of the mud. I turned around and did it again! Once it’s dirty, it will never be clean again.

On the way back I tested out the Crawl control. It doesn’t sound confident but, it works well. The noises it produces are signatures of the ABS pump firing on and off to control the speed of the truck going downhill.

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At home, I got back and took my time washing the mud out of the fender wells that seemed to take forever. After around two hours of slowing cleaning the mud and dirt off, I realized the truck would never be clean again. Fine, now you’ll make me use you!

I’ll also tell you that the next day my wife came home from running errands and was laughing. She said she decided to follow her GPS home and took THE SAME ROAD in her 2017 Toyota Sienna SE. Apparently the mudhole was nearly dry, but regardless I had another car to clean...

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I can’t believe she took a lowered minivan down that road. I guess if it has four-wheels it must be four-wheel-drive?!