It was the water pump.

In case you were curious what the actual failure was that led me to give up on the ZJ and go impulse-buy a Land Cruiser - it was the water pump.

Apparently the bearing failed in spectacular fashion, taking the seal with it. All the coolant in the engine bay presumably then came blasting out of the weep hole and all over the fan. The steel impeller then started trying to bore its way through the aluminum housing.

It’s actually a fairly simple repair. It took me a lazy 90 minutes to get the water pump off. I have the new one sitting on the bench right now. It’ll probably take me another lazy 90 minutes to put the new one in and fill the system back up.

After that, I’ll be putting it up for sale. Time to move on.