I shall name this RSX belonging to an employee of a business near my house, Farty McFartelson

Illustration for article titled I shall name this RSX belonging to an employee of a business near my house, Farty McFartelson
Photo: Textured Soy Protein

This is not a recent story. It happened back in February 2019, I meant to post about it, and totally forgot, until now.

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I live in a nook of townhouses right in the middle of my densely populated quasi-urban suburb of DC. There’s a strip mall type building up a hill and over a fence from my house. Often, either around 11-12 at night, or 6-7 AM, but not exclusively at those times, I’ll hear a loud-ass 4 banger idling, revving, and leaving obnoxiously, or arriving, etc. They never shift out of first gear in the parking lot. It’s loud and annoying.

Finally, I decided to mosey on over there and see what I could see about the cars parked behind this place. I came upon this stock-looking RSX parked in a non-space. Other than the window visors, there was nothing notable about it from this angle, but I decided to investigate further.

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Photo: Textured Soy Protein

A-pillar gauge pod! This is totally the car that bugs the crap of me! Most likely they are not a cop. Sometimes car people around here put police stickers or patches in their cars in the hope that if they get hassled by a cop, the cop will see the patch/sticker and let them off with a warning.

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Then I checked around the back of the car.

Illustration for article titled I shall name this RSX belonging to an employee of a business near my house, Farty McFartelson
Photo: Textured Soy Protein
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Bingo.

Oh, and of course, I shit you not, right as I was typing up this post in my bedroom which is in the back of my house, I heard the damn thing pull into the back parking lot of the strip mall, idle for a while, and turn off.

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Good old Farty McFartleson, still being ever so slightly annoying all this time later.